Impact Of Helicopter Parenting
We, humans, have been evolving with time in terms of lifestyle, education, technology etc.. In this manner, the parenting style has evolved from being a natural birth skill to acquired life skill. For instance, then, the parents seldom cared about the child's academic grades as compared to the stressed-out parents now, who consider even a mere school test, a big deal. It surely shows that the style of parenting has changed from being carefree parent to hovering helicopter parent.
22 January, 2020
Helicopter parenting, a trend in the recent decade, is the style of parenting where parents are over focussed on their children. They take too much responsibility for their child's experience specifically in their achievements and failures. They are often overcontrolling, overprotective and over perfecting their child's life in a way that is excess of responsible parenting.
These parents, apart from controlling their child's schoolwork, homework and projects, also try to control their social interactions obstructing their freedom of speech. These kids bear the brunt of helicopter parenting and as they develop into individuals, they have decreased confidence and self-esteem. They don't believe in their own capabilities and strengths as they have been made to believe so, by their parents. They are unable to cope up with unfamiliar or stressful situations which often leads to higher levels of child's anxiety or even depression. In a habit of always getting help from their parents they often end up with underdeveloped life skills. When even the smallest of task is done by their parents, they hardly learn the skill to do it on their own.
Indian parents these days argue that the world has become highly competitive and in order to get better results academically they have to constantly hover over their children. They never try to learn about the child's likes or dislikes but on the contrary they try to impose their choice upon the kids, from even a trivial thing like picking up a hobby to their career. The constant pressure on the child sometimes gets too much that the child even resorts to self harm.
Parenting is no longer a relationship between the parent and the child but has become a lifestyle issue, a matter of prestige amongst the parents’ social circle. They want to flaunt not just their child's grades but even the extracurricular achievements. With the advent of social media when every milestone is highly glorified it becomes a peer pressure even amongst parents to present their kids as a perfect package.
I have seen a mother who always hover over her 10 years old daughter, by checking her bag if she had packed the right books for school the next day, accompanying her to music classes in which she was hardly interested against being in sports. She even used to accompany her to her friends’ place trying to know about her friend’s family. Her overprotectiveness had led to the annoyance and irritated behaviour of her daughter and overcontrolling had come to a stage when her daughter was not able to do simplest of her task by herself.
We come across many such instances in our day to day life. As parents, we should be cautious about our child's needs and requirements but at the same time we should give them some space to breath and enjoy, let them face their own struggles and learn to go through life on their own. We should also let the child decide upon their likes or dislikes and not imposing our own choices on them.
About Priyanka Rai
I am a dental surgeon, an army wife and a mother of a 30 months old daughter grooming her round the clock. Writing is my passion and when not writing I love to spend my time in the company of books and my daughter.My life changed completely two and a half years ago when my daughter was born. From being a working woman to a full-time mother was a tremendous transition but I cherish every moment of it. From the moment when I held her first till the time, I walked her to playschool every moment has been sheer bliss. I love talking to her, reading books to her and capturing her different moods and moments.
This is personal experience and point of view of Mrs Priyanka Rai as a mother. Happy Motherhood does not take responsibility for the contents and those not necessarily represent point of view of Happy Motherhood